I had the same feeling after reading this as I did after my life coaching sessions in 2006.  I was simultaneously relieved and apprehensive.  Relieved because I realised I had control for how I am and how I exist in this world, yet apprehensive precisely because I am responsible for how I am and how I exist in this world (and thus no one else to blame if I was unhapppy with how things are).

The way live and the actions we take are framed by 2 components, our Quality Worlds – our imagination of how we can best satisfy our need for love, power, freedom and fun; and our behaviour – the activity, thinking, feeling and physiological operations that give effect to what’s in our quality worlds.  Whether consciously or unconsciously, we behave in ways to give effect to what’s in our imagination.  Unhappiness and frustration results from a mismatch between what’s in our heads and what happens in real life, or a clash of quality worlds between different people.

Choice theory is therefore a method to put ourselves at the front and centre and in control of what goes on in our head as well as our behaviour.  A simple way that Glasser reframes the way we imagine ourselves and our behaviour is to convert adjectives (ie. I am depressed, nervous, angry) to verbs (ie. I am depress-ing, nervous-ing, anger-ing).  It transforms a person’s state of being from passive subject to active controller.  If I choose to depress, I can also choose not to depress.

In a situation of unhappiness or frustration, the choices available to us are:

1. To change what we want (changing what’s or who’s in our quality world);
2. Change what we’re doing (changing our behaviour); or
3. Change both.

The book is set out in 2 parts – the first takes the reader through the theory and the second shows the theory in practice. A very readable and well structured book, Glasser gives many examples of how Choice Theory can be applied in relationships of all sorts, whether in families, workplaces or schools.  He’s like an uncle that doesn’t give you extravagant Christmas presents or cuddles you if you graze your knee, but the one that you learn to appreciate for his straight talking, no nonsense advice.  A book worth returning to from time to time.  ♥♥♥♥♥

- review by CC

Saturday Oases breakfast: February 4 2012 from 9-11am

    Topic: China: Australia’s Challenge

    Speaker: Prof. Joseph Camilleri

BA (Melb), MA(Monash), PhD (Lond), OAM.

About Joseph:

Joseph Camilleri is Professor of International Relations at La Trobe University. He has written and lectured extensively on international relations, governance and globalisation, human rights, North-South relations, international organisations, the United Nations, and the Asia-Pacific region.

Professor Camilleri is actively engaged in international research, education and advocacy on issues of human rights, civilisation dialogue, global governance reform, peace and security. He is the recipient of St Michael’s Award for Distinguished Service to the Community, and past Australian President of the International Christian Peace Movement, Pax Christi.

Recent publications:

Regionalism in the New Asia Pacific Order (Edward Elgar 2003)

Co-edited Democratizing Global Governance (Palgrave Macmillan 2002)

Edited Religion and Culture in Asia Pacific: Violence or Healing? (Vista 2001)

with Jim Falk: Worlds in Transition: Evolving Governance Across a Stressed Planet (2010)

Here is some information about when Common Ground is playing at the Environmental Film Festival in Melbourne. If you want to pass this onto your groupies then that would be swell. If you would like to come yourself… well that would be extra swell.

Common Ground 6:30 Kino Cinema Wednesday 12th October Screening with feature film Play Again

TO BOOK: https://www.palacecinemas.com.au/sessiontimes/session/300/24396/ Tickets: $18 adults $14 concession Synopsis: Leaning over green beans in Melbourne’s Federation Square Uncle Bob looks at Hollie, “Come to my home this Tuesday”. Home was half across Australia on the bright side of Uluru. Our documentary was in the making. Uncle Bob is a desert man and Hollie grew up in the concrete walls of Melbourne. They couldn’t be more different. However while reconnecting with the Australian landscape they find common ground.

Oases breakfast: Saturday October 1

9am-11am

Maryanne looks to the prophets;

A timely conversation

Speaker: Dr Maryanne Confoy RSC

Who are the prophets in our globalized worlds of interfaith and intercultural communities of faith? What are the prophetic words and deeds in a time of environments and political conflict ideologies and belief systems …of the striving between the global North and South.

About Maryanne:

Maryanne Confoy has completed a BA Melbourne; post graduate studies at Boston College, and Harvard Graduate School of Education; a PhD in Theology and Education from Boston College.

At present she lectures in Practical Theology at the Jesuit Theological College and is a past President of the United Faculty of Theology in Melbourne, Victoria. She is Visiting Professor at the Institute of Religious Education and Pastoral Ministry at Boston College, USA. She is also Director of Kilbride Centre for Spirituality and Personal Development in Albert Park, Victoria an ecumenical and community based initiative.

cost waged $25, unwaged $15 RSVP to OASES 03 9819 3502 or email info@oases.edu.au This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it info@oases.edu.au This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

Sister Maryanne Confoy

Video link http://wheelercentre.com/videos/video/reading-on-vocation-nuns/

Another full weekend of oases units – the Aesthetics discussion flowed from the appreciation of knowledge, to the experience of art, to the experience of food!

Included screening of Video The Music Instinct Science and Song (Director Elena Mannes)  “The Music Instinct: Science & Song provides a ground-breaking exploration into how and why the human organism, and the whole ebb and flow of the cosmos, is moved by the undeniable effect of music.” from the ABC website. (Screened Aug 2010).

Clips from the video can be viewed here on the PBS website.

I just came across information about Endicott College in Mass. East Coast USA, and was somewhat startled by the similarities in the ethos with oases. But given the general dysfunction we see around us, should I be surprised? In part of their website they write:

“The Great Work is a phrase coined by Cultural Historian, Thomas Berry in his 1999 book of the same title. Berry proposed that the Great Work of our time comes in response to the recognition that the ecological devastation we see around us is the result of human activity. He asserted that the task before us is to reinvent the human to become a benign, but active presence on Earth.

Each of us begins this task by responding to what Mathematical Cosmologist Brian Swimme describes as “the allurements that beckon us, by following our passions and interests” The Great Work involves aligning our personal sense of allurement with the larger creative dynamics of the Earth community.”

These folk have been apparently going since 1939! So there might be something to learn from them.

Ecology from Ashly Stewart on Vimeo.

This short animation by Ashly Stewart called Ecology is an interesting critique of social networking – and good articulation of alternative approaches and thinking.

I had discussions with some oases participants, in the unit Time, Media, Consciousness, about the challenges and shadow side of social media. One of the key concepts to emerge was the importance of humanising social media.

In this short animation we get a critique of the narcissistic clutter that social media / networking produces, and a good articulation of what is emerging, platforms for dialogue.

Good metaphors and worth a few minutes of your time.

Upcoming – TURNING HOPE INTO ACTION: THE PATH OF SACRED ACTIVISM

The following online event interested me for a variety of reasons. First, I’m attracted to Gandhian forms of non-violent civil disobedience. But I’m also searching for spiritual life purpose to guide my activism. In short, righteous indignation is not enough. The wind left these sails a few years ago. My activism can only be motivated by something deeper now, and ‘sacred’ is one of the most tangible words I can find.

“Evolver Intensive course with Andrew Harvey.  Andrew is famous around the world for his inspirational talks about Sacred Activism and his deep commitment to a life of engagement.  Register by midnight PST today to join him in our exclusive 6-part live online video course on how to have a passionate experience of the Divine as we devote ourselves to helping others.”

Jose

Share the journey of 4 oases graduate school participants; Dimity, Anne, Lesley & Taryn

About the presenters:

All are completing year 4 in Integrative and Transformative Studies.  Come and share their journeys about what they have discovered in themselves and their place in the wider world context.